We have all, at some given point, in our lives, had our hearts broken due to rejection. We find ourselves being increasingly vulnerable and our tempers flare to ensnare all around us. We aren’t programmed to deal with rejection from people we love; we have grown up knowing that love is a two way street and true love is always met with a happy ending. Sometimes our fairy tale romances don’t work out; sometimes reality has different plans than our willful heart. Here’s one such lover who dealt with such tough circumstances.

Dear Urban Cupid,

My girlfriend of four years and I broke up about six months ago. The separation was her idea; I never thought things between us would ever end. I will always love and care of her deeply. Despite the fact that I feel cheated and alone, I wish her all the happiness in the world. To my dismay, she has now started dating one of my closest friends. I wanted to be the bigger man so when they came to me to confess, I gave them my okay. My ex still calls me and speaks to me about her new boyfriend, even though I want to be friends, it hurts to listen to her having moved on so fast. Now I feel heartbroken, alone and betrayed on all accounts, I don’t know what to do.

Yours Truly,

Ramesh G.

Dear Ramesh,

From what I can tell, you are nice guy with your heart in the right place. I don’t grudge you the fact that you are hung up on your ex girlfriend considering the fact that you were together for four years. She does seem to have moved on rather quickly. The fact remains that what is done is done, she is with someone else, cherish the time that you had and emotionally detach yourself from her. If you insist on remaining friends, take a break from her for a while – absolute detachment – before you can proceed with being buddies. Meanwhile, till you muster the courage to stop communication for a brief period, request her not to burden you with details of her relationship as it affects you. Maintain your distance and after a while being around her won’t be so difficult.

Chin up,

UC

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