9 Stupid Pick-up Lines That Will Get You Slapped
April 10, 2014 @ 11:57 am
If you think you are some sort of a gift to mankind or if you believe that there is no one quite like you because you are ‘unique’ and ‘special’, we double dare you to use these pick-up lines. Let us know if you survived the onslaught.
Considering this dare? Then get a good look in the mirror. Get a grip and avoid these 9 outrageous pickup lines. Unless of course, you’d like to get shot at:
1. "Do you have a map? I just keep getting lost in your eyes"
She will give you a map, a comprehensive one that takes your behind right to the curb. Not only does it sounds like you're the mayor of a cheese fest, you'll also come across as being irrevocably stupid.
2. "Do you prefer your eggs fertilized or well done?"
Utter these words and secure you position at your neighbour sty and bachelor's club...for life. The only thing you'll be hearing as a response is, "Kill it before it lays eggs".
3. "You're ugly but you intrigue me."
You've got to be really drunk to use this number. Like absolutely rogered. So sloshed that you can remember your own name. Essentially because you wouldn't want to remember the humiliation that ensues.
4. “Excuse me, can I borrow your phone, I need to call my mom and tell her I’m in love.”
She won't come back to get her phone, we assure you. Wave her a mighty goodbye as you see her running for the hills.
5. "My love for you is like diarrhoea, I just can't hold it in."
Apart from the fact that you have serious issues, you should really see a doctor. It might be contagious. The stupidity, we mean.
6. "Are you cold? Because I’m Charles Xavier and I've been mentally undressing you."
We’ve got two words for you - ‘Restraining Order’. That’s exactly what the cops will be presenting you with after they’ve slapped you around. The only mutation you have is the stupid gene in your brain.
7. "Is your name Gillette? Because you're the best a man can get."
The boys at Gillette are slashing their wrists because they can't believe you just did that. Don't tell us we didn't warn you about the drink launched at your face!
8. "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?”
This isn't the worst of the lot but it's pretty, for the lack of a better word, sh*t. Unoriginal and used by monumentally hotter men before you, we suggest you drop it.
9. “Do you speak Klingon because you're out of this world"
Ever heard the sound of nails against a chalkboard? That sounds like music right about now. At least now we know who needs a first class, no return ticket to Mars.
gif courtesy: bollypop.in, giphy.com
Heard cheekier pick-up lines? Let us know in the comments below.
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