URBAN CUPID: Everybody does it
August 08, 2012 @ 00:00 am
We are often swayed by the choices our peers make. We like to be a part of something; we feel the need to belong.
When we are in love, the object of our affection becomes a primary factor in our decision making process, we discount our inherent principles to make them feel more welcome in our life. This happens to the best of us and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, the issue arises when the friend circle within which we exist, pressurizes us to take steps we, usually wouldn’t take. Peers mean no harm but a nudge in the direction of one puff of a cigarette, a sip of scotch or a roll in the hay can result in resentment and regret. There is much to be said for trial and error but a little caution doesn’t harm anyone. Today, Bharti Tyagi faces a similar issue, read on.
Bharti Tyagi: I am 18 and am a virgin. My boyfriend is 21 and we have been going out for 6 months. He says it is time that we slept together. He is not a virgin and he says it isn’t half as scary as they make it to be. I don't want to and besides I am not really ready yet. But it is a common thing amongst our close friends. Is there a way I can avoid him till another time, without him leaving me?
Dear Bharti Tyagi,
It is not scary at all, but it still depends on whether you are willing to concede or not. According to the law; you are eligible to have sex with a partner, as long as both of you are consenting. Obviously, your boyfriend is being very frank about this escapade; which does not mean that you have to be plucked of your virginity because everyone does so, in your friend circle, or “it isn’t half as scary as they make it to be”. Some couples just progress into a physical relationship, while others cherish a subtlety that is so natural to our culture. On a serious note; I do not blame you for saying no to your boyfriend, because he seems to be rather forward. Have a conversation with him about the choices you have made and get him to respect your stand.
P.S.: Tell me what happens…
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