‘Worst Film: Student of the Year. Because more betas/betis need to be launched. And because Karan Johar still has some gay jokes unused’. When the nomination scroll of an award show starts with those promising words, you know what’s about to follow will be nothing short of epic!
As the award season bears upon us, and the Barfis and the Jab Tak Hai Jaans bask in the adulation and applause, the Players and the Teri Meri Kahaanis standing on the other side of the fence sidle by unnoticed. Which is a shame, because out of the hundred odd films that Bollywood churns out each year, around 68 and a half make you want to pull your hair out in frustration, invent a time machine and erase those two damning hours from your life.
Agitated over this gross injustice; stand-up comedians across the country decided to unite and use their powers for the greater good. Say hello to the Filmfail Awards, which has taken up the noble task of ensuring that movies like Players and Kya Superkool Hai Hum don’t go unfelicitated. From the Ghanta Awards which promises a golden ghanta (literally!) to the worst of Bollywood, to the Golden Kela Awards and their quirky categories along the lines of Bawra Ho Gaya Ke, to the Royal Turds hosted by funnyman Tanmay Bhagat and G- Khamba of All India Bakchod fame – These award shows very much exist, in fact, Sonam Kapoor showed up at the Golden Kelas last year and was lauded for being sporting enough to accept the WTF Was That award!
So inspired are we by these noble award shows that we feel obligated to pitch in and show our support to the cause too! So pop in a pinch of salt and vote for your favourite nominations in the comments box below!
b.1920 – Evil Returns
Most Forgettable Debut
a.Amy Jackson, Ek Deewana Tha
b.Sunny Leone, Jism 2
c.That chick from Hate Story
The Arnab Goswami Award for Most Pointless Dialogue
a.Apun Ka Fatka, Char Sau Challis Ka Jhatka, Rowdy Rathore
b.Ch, Uu Ki Matra; Ta, Ee Ki Matra; Ya, Aa Ki Matra, Student of the Year
c.Don’t Angry Me, Rowdy Rathore
The Bakwaas Wala Crap Award for Worst Lyrics
a.Pon Pon Pon, Son of Sardaar
b.Papa Toh Band Bajaye, Houseful 2
c.Halkat Jawani, Heroine
The ACP Pradyuman Award for Most Facepalm Climax
c.Teri Meri Kahaani
Most Eye - Gouging Use of 3D
c.a & b
d.All of the above
The Royal Turds
The Golden Kela Awards
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